Observing and treating clinically cases of divorce or separation on regular basis, we want to share with couples who are either divorced or going through a separation due to incompatibility or because of death, as a warning we want to say the following:
When you are going through a chaotic situation because of divorce or separation, it is extremely important to seek help from a reliable professional, seek moral support from those that you are sure they have been loyal and reliable to you, such as your parents, close relatives, and in rare cases from friends preferably of the same sex.
When you are going through an emotionally chaotic situation such as a divorce or breakup in relationships, it is recommended not to be involved in major decisions, whether this is in business, sale of valuable properties, or yield your administrative or legal rights; the reason is obvious, at the time of emotionally disturbance you may not be coherent to make sound decisions; once your condition stabilized you might discover that a decision you made can be adverse for you, in these cases it is advisable to seek legal aid to represent you.
It is of extremely importance to consider when there are children involved, especially when they are of short age, they will suffer the full blast of the consequences, think seriously before you consider the route of divorce, do not act selfishly, consider first your responsibilities toward the children.
There is another important point that I want to approach, particularly for divorced women considering rebuilding their life; if they have teenage daughters, there is a potential risk, because they are prone to sexual harassment coming from the new husband, or by the teenage herself; I am not saying that this happen so frequently, no, but I have attended in my consulting room many cases of this nature, so, women must pay particular attention to signals that may be suspicious either from the side of the man or from the girl herself; that happens for many reasons, sometimes is for competition between mother and daughter or vice versa. This is just a warning; this subject will be addressed separate in the future.
There are others advises in this field, we encourage our visitors to submit their request on themes they are interested in.
God Bless you all
Dr. Alberto J. Arana
Family Counseling Ministry